The Hidden Reasons Behind Chronic Fatigue & Persistent Pain

Once upon a time, I used to be this energetic girl, always excited at the prospect of venturing outdoors to play, and as an only child, extremely keen on connecting with my cousins and friends. When my parents introduced me to traveling, it opened up a whole new world and I immediately caught the all too common travel bug. Adventures were my lifeblood. I looked forward to them in my darkest moments, and they served as an antitode to the stressors and mishaps of my younger days.

And then one day in adulthood, something shifted. It started with a couple of nights of poor quality sleep while on a trip, which had me feeling moody and exhausted the following day. Then, another trip went contrary to my expectations; I quarrelled with a couple of travelling buddies as my body and mind somehow couldn’t keep up - I was hungry when they weren’t, I slept poorly, and - unknowingly to myself back then - my nervous system was dysregulated due to some issues that I’d had to deal with in the months prior, and which I hadn’t properly processed.

Shortly after that unsuccessful trip, I developed my first bout of chronic pain.

I’m sure that many of you can relate. Many of us think of our bodies as this tank that’s constantly at risk of getting emptied, unless we get enough rest. Energy leaks out of us because we sleep or eat poorly, or because we simply get exhausted with our daytime activities. We think this is normal, until it gets too draining, and we notice that others aren’t struggling as much as we are.

But what if there were another reason behind chr0nic fatigue and pain besides the obvious contributing factors like sleep and diet? This is what I’d like to explore in this post.

Anxiety, Negative thoughts and Chronic Fatigue

It is quite true that we need a certain amount of sleep (7-9 hours) for our body to be able to function optimally. However, what we often feel to recognize is that good quality sleep depends on our levels of inner distress and anxiety.

Anxiety is often present in our thoughts, especially if we tend to ruminate. The research shows that “Affective rumination […] has been linked to sleep impairments (Syrek et al., 2017), higher fatigue, and lower levels of vigor in the evening (Minnen et al., 2021)”.

Besides affecting our sleep, negative rumination also drains us of energy. After all, our brain needs high amounts of energy to function, and if we’re constantly wreaking our brains as we try to figure out our seemingly insurmountable problems, it makes sense for us to feel drained - not just mentally, but also physically.

In fact, a study exploring the relationship between fatigue and rumination about unfinished tasks in teachers has noted that “higher affective rumination on average is related to lower average levels of vitality” (Gerald M. Weiher et al., 2022). Similar studies have emphasized that “Negative work-related thoughts during non-work time hinder recovery from work-related stress (Wendsche et al., 2021; Jimenez et al., 2022)”.

The body is NOT to blame. And trying to fix it can make things worse

Many of us make the mistake of blaming the body as the principal culprit behind symptoms. We get our bloodwork done, we tend to any vitamin deficiencies and imbalances, we try to get enough sleep, or we simply blame it all on the fact that we’re getting older.

While there’s nothing wrong in nourishing your body with the right vitamins, and it’s definitely recommended that you do get a good amount of sleep, very often these strategies don’t work for anxiety-induced chronic fatigue.

As the research suggests, the real cause that’s draining our body of fuel are our anxious thoughts, our negative ruminations, the tendency to control our life that keeps us in a state of war with life and with own body.

By trying to micromanage our body with too many supplements or therapeutic strategies we also run the risk of getting stuck in this state of hyperarousal and anxiety - which means that we fail to enter the parasympathetic state, the state needed for our body to actually rest and regenerate.

What often happens is that gradually, symptoms get worse. We become very rigid and limited in what we can or cannot do. Personally, I noticed that I was unable to enjoy full days out on my travels - I so firmly believed that I needed to rest in the afternoons that the thought of not resting was triggering more anxiety, and was making me hyper-focused on any discomfort present in my body. The brain tends to amplify such discomfort when we focus on it.

Naturally, that created more anxiety as I approached sleep. Instead of going to bed knowing that I would simply drift into sleep (as I used to when I was younger), I went in with my heart racing, as if I was getting ready for battle; the battle was being waged against anything that could disrupt my sleep, be it a noise outside, my own body, my husband’s tossing and turning, the annoying mosquito that might or might not have entered the room, the room temperature, and so on.

Naturally, that increased my chances of not sleeping. I also started feeling more and more pain in different parts of my body, which I later realized were mindbody / neuroplastic symptoms.

Until one day I realized that this wasn’t normal at all. Something had to change. I started to recall how things used to be. And that’s when I indentified one crucial factor behind all my problems: overthinking and negative rumination.

I was anticipating way too many obstacles and problems. Because of this, I was unable to let go and relax. And even though there could be real obstacles to sleep (such as that annoying mosquito buzzing around my ear), I noticed that on high anxiety days, these obstacles seemed to magnify. The more I fought them, the worse things got, until in the end, even a minor sound sent my heart racing and my blood boiling.

A 4 step approach to get out of the spiral of overthinking and negative rumination

It took time and some trial and error to get out of the downward spiral of anxiety, overthinking, fatigue and pain. But in reality, it needn’t be too complicated. Anything that we resist will persist, and so it becomes clear that resistance to the current state needs to be released first, and that any symptoms should be acknowledged for what they are - consequences of a dysregulated nervous system.

If you resonate with the above, here’s a 4-step process to get you to gradually step out of the .

1. Recognize and accept that your physical body isn’t the problem - symptoms are just a consequence of your emotional state. This will help you let go of the urge to constantly blame and judge your body for its weaknesses.

2. Notice your tendency to constantly ruminate negatively or to problem-solve the same issues. If you haven’t solved the problem yet, chances are you won’t solve it with more rumination. Instead, direct your attention to something you can enjoy in the moment, and if needed, take some time out. If you tend to hesitate to ask for help, then do take that action, as hesitation and indecision are two emotional states that keep the body stressed and dysregulated.

3. Adopt a regular meditation practice. Meditation doesn’t have to be lengthy. It’s enough to simply go out in the sunlight and be present with your surroundings for a minute. Feel the breeze and tune in to your bodily sensations - most importantly, accept any sensations as they are. For more guidance, I would suggest you check out my somatic tracking exercises.

4. Do not overthink your actions, drop those negative expectations and aim for ‘normal’ behaviour. Go to bed at the same time your partner or friend does, and assume that you will sleep. Choose your preferred diet and don’t second-guess it. Say yes to invitations as much as possible, and don’t limit yourself just because you fear it will be ‘too much for your body to take’. Fearing that an activity will be too draining for you will lead to exactly that outcome whenever you do engage with it. Choose a different assumption instead, and be okay with any outcome.

   With time, you will rewire your brain to expect different outcomes, and you will create enough positive experiences which will make all of the above way easier. It’s always much tougher in the beginning.

You don’t need to live with symptoms all your life!

Many individuals sadly think that they have to keep managing their chronic symptoms. But really, this isn’t the case for a multitude of neuroplastic, anxiety-induced symptoms - even if you’ve had these symptoms for a very, very long time.

The reasons why symptoms persist for so long is that we tend to adopt the same attitudes, the same thoughts, and the same reactions. Our brain keeps responding in the same way to our triggers - until we actively decide to do something about it on a conscious level.

If you’re at a loss on where to start, I invite you to check out my tailored programs, and to also do your own research about neuroplastic / TMS symptoms. Really understand what’s going on, and then work with your thoughts. The process starts with self-awareness and continues with conscious repetition of new habits and thought processes. Many others have done it, and I’m pretty sure, so can you.